Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Day Four - Rain and more rain!

It is day four and awake at my usual just past six o clock, rushing for the drugs and then dozing until 9.05 fantastic!

It is day 4 and last night intense burning pain is slowly going away from the tonsil area. You read and speak to people about adult illnesses you should of got as a child, mumps, tonsils out, wisdom teeth out, chicken pox, and they say "oh its much worse as an adult" I am sure they say with glee as they were a sickly child and had all the ailments under the sun and now know you will suffer 15 times the pain they did! I suspect they are the sort of people you would find at the front of witch bonfire complaining that "witches need so much help to burn these days"

I am sorry to say the witch burners are right! Bring on the witches I here you say!

Today is support day, I have contacted FORCE a cancer charity in Exeter who have just opened a fantastic charity support centre in the grounds of the RD&E hospital at a cost of �G900k raised by local charities, yes local charities. I must admit there is something obsence about a country that spends �G3 billion pounds removing a ruler of a country under a false and illegal premise, but forces charities to raise funds for health support services that should of been provided out of the �G3 billion pounds. Sorry being political but the point I make is a no brainer when you consider this week a 9 year old died in Great Ormond Street Hospital because there were no funds available!

I am off to the FORCE relaxation therapy session tomorrow, 12-1 which I am looking forward to, and on hand there are counsellors and complimentary therapies which alas there is a waiting list but at least I am on the bus and with a ticket.

The phrase "on the bus and with a ticket" is my latest buzz phrase because that is where I am. I have a chance, I am on the life bus and have a ticket, last week many were denied entry to that bus given bad news, and not allowed a ticket, it is for me to safeguard that ticket and keep the bus rolling!

Keep attacking!



Anonymous said...

When you're having a black day you have to remember all those things you still want to do in your life. The cottage on the coast of Cornwall with the big wooden table in the kitchen and the roaring log fire. You have also got 2 little people that love their daddy to bits and although I've never met them I'm sure they are wonderful. Think of them and I'm sure you will feel much better

mazzagee said...

Visualise your destination on that bus. What do you want to achieve with the rest of your life? If you have plans just how determined are you to carry them out? Most people have goals to aim for. Rather than view the world through rose coloured glasses, which is too easy for people to do, look more to the realities of life. You could be sitting on your laurels and feeling sorry for yourself but instead you are being positive by sharing your experiences. This could be construed as very commendable or a cry for help. Which is it for you? Asking questions of yourself is good therapy in itself and whether it is raining or a day full of sunshine there will always be a good and bad side to everything. You choose which it is going to be. With all the support of your family and friends I am sure you will choose the more positive side as that is what will get you through to a full recovery, then when your bus ticket has expired and you find you can step off at your destination, you will be able to pass it on to someone else and help them into the seat you have just vacated and wish them well on their road to recovery. In fact you could share your own recovery with others still waiting to find out about their destination by visiting them and proving that there is a light waiting when they arrive. There now maybe that could be your first goal to aim for. Good Luck. Not that you will need it.

Orpah said...

Well seeing as you had no sympathy for me finding my first grey hair this evening not sure i wanna be nice to you anymore!! :-) And if you want me to continue to bring chocolate to you your gonna have to (a) have a word with your local shop and get them to stock up and (b) spell my name correctly!!

What to do on black days... well you can always phone me and i'll nag you about all the things you should be doing.. like looking for a new car etc etc....!

Alternatively what always works for me is getting some really loud music going... U2 always does it fot me... but anything thats loud and fast and you know ALL the words to, not only will it take the mind off your blues if you choose something you really love its probably got happy memories attached that will make you smile!

I'm not gonna do sentimental on here... it feels strange to be writing this to someone who i've know for such a short time but who i seem to know so well... but having been reading these over the past couple of days it obvious you have a lot of people supporting you and caring about you and reaslising that should put a smile on your face.

So my recipe.. chill time, music and chocolate.... mmm :-)

Nigel said...

mazzagee I have no idea who are but what a post it great heart to read it and I have printed it off and will carry it with me.