Day 21- Bollocks to cancer!

Teeth out at Dentist = Nil
New people wishing me "good luck" as if I was off to sail around the World = Three
Pain 7 but still decreasing, but still electric
Mind 3 as I spent £400 quid in Makro, 300 quid a new printer, Mincinglake watch out!

Day 21, three weeks ago I had the tonsil out, two weeks ago I had the neck dissection and wisdom tooth. Not worth celebrating! Let’s move on.

Today was good special thanks to Sarah and O for their help today, collectively helping with washing and lifts to dentist which happens to beside Makro helped me achieve my aims. I am now beginning to experience how older people get on in small villages without support, the answer they do not and they must feel so isolated. the West Country is full of lonely old people, came to Devon to retire, partner dies, no family local, too old to establish new circle of friends, stranded in a small town or village.

I have contacted a couple of volunteer organisations today, one of which will be a befriending organisation it is the least I can do.

I do feel a sense of loneliness, not through not having people around me or coming to visit, but the fight is very lonely. This was echoed in a documentary tonight by a 19 year old going through chemo therapy. I am fortunate that my regime is not the same, but I took away the sentiments of the doctors "It is the younger people you feel so guilty about, the ones you can treat, they have a chance and it is our job to ensure they are cured. They are the ones that keep me awake at night"

I have seen that look in my doctors eyes with me, I have seen their body language, the words they use are power words, treatment, all guns blazing, zapping, getting rid of, destroying, catching early, belt and braces, maximum doses, I owe to me and them to ensure that I win! Coming second is not an option I must win!

Kevin, called tonight, for those who do not this wonderful bloke, he has been a rock to me. Kevin is a staff nurse in the Oncology department at the RD&E hospital as well as being a bloody good Lib Dem Councillor. Kevin was on duty today and took a phone call today to book a Mr Nigel Gooding in for Chemo and Radiation therapy and the caller gave him my dates in a very matter of fact way. Kev if you are reading this I know how hard that call was to take and I know you had to take time out afterwards. Your a great bloke and this World needs more of you.

I find 7pm onwards very tiring, tonight is no exception however, it is clear that my normal avenues of de-stressing which involve exercise are not there at the moment because of my shoulder and neck. The cancer would be easier to cope with if I had full mobility and other areas of mind and body occupation need to be found, any suggestions?