Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Day 80 something - Home day 2

Pain levels : tongue, throat and mouth 7-10, a faller from yesterday's 8-10 unless coughing ten back to 9-10.

As I inspect the ferry house after my ordeal and few weeks away I note very little has changed except words. On of the longest set of statements and words are all around treatment. Terms like "treatment over, finished and completed" are used. This is because there are not tangible you cannot yet actually derive a benefit from a treatment such as you can when you have a painful tooth removed.

I have always said cancer treatments "radiotherapy and Chemo" are oxymorons and they may you feel worse before you are expected to get better.

Its now 7 days since my last full dose of radiotherapy I was too zonked to hold a party, to sicky to scream hurrah! and planin sensible not to kiss dirty unhallowed hospital floor, after all I know what goes on in there. My last 10 days stuck in hospital showed how lucky I was, my moving around the ward to make allowances for fellow patients who were dying was obvious, in fact I was told! The pain in voices of those who had been told earlier that there was no cure and that all they could do was to delay to inevitable. I am not going into fill detail here as I was too unwell to document anything down, but I felt this was my personal space, alone with my thoughts and others away from me.

The pain continues see my scientific laser display earlier up the screen. It is all in my throat but not long before drinks and food start making their way back down that hill.

Anyway need to go back and study my charts, as the wind is up and there is no sail today x N


Graham Jones Orihuela Costa said...

Well nice to hear from you. Keep up the fight, be good and let people look after you

Anonymous said...

Nigel, Been witrh Charlie today and he updated me. Hope all is well and I now have your contact details so perhaps we can get together one lunchtime soon.
In my thoughts and looking forward to meeting you again soon.
Derek Taylor

Anonymous said...

Hi my darling,
so pleased you are home. Let everyone look after you, put your weight back on and sleep. Let me know when your well enough for visitors and i will be there. x
take care my man of the year

marta x

L said...

Glad to have you back. Missed your musings. Muse away when you're able. Hope you're feeling well again soon.


Anonymous said...

What is a 'co - father?'