Saturday, September 24, 2005

Day 33/34/35 Holiday views

I must admit I have always thought of South Wales as an industrial bomb site, mainly through my time there in the 1980's and 1990's however I must admit the Black Mountains and the Brecon Beacons are a wonderful part of the World.

If you add in Hay on Wye, Brecon, and the great woodland drives the countryside the place has a powerful beauty. The hills opps sorry mountains are stunning they are powerful and massive they show the carving out done millions of years ago in all their beauty.

I was not strong enough this year to walk them but next year I will be strong enough to march along the huge plateaus and admire the views.

We were lucky with the weather, warm and indian summer and I was well looked after by battypat and Ron.

I enjoyed the time away it gave me time away to comtemplate lots of things, life, me, my illness and my plight. Life deals us many challenges and I see cancer as just that, the tounge sores are a by product of my treatment, and boy did they make themselves known this week. It was the end of the day when they made their real impact, the pain was unbearable and two nights I reached for the morphine to help me sleep. I must admit the break did me good and left me relaxed and mellow.

I had time to think about me. I am angry, why me, why now, if only I had 10 more years before having to deal with this dreadful illness my children would of been young adults and I do not have live with this fear for the next 10 years. I have read accounts of oral cancer patients who say in 6 to 12 months time you feel that the treatment and cancer was like flu and you look back and think wow I am glad to be alive. I count the days off until that day.

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